Do You Remember
by dancercofd
Summary: Callie reminisces on the last few years with Arizona


Disclaimer: All television shows, movies, books, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work, and the characters, settings, and events thereof, are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for-profit, it constitutes fair use.

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><p>She's perfect. Well, maybe not perfect. She's perfect to me though, for me. We're lying down on a blanket in the grassy backyard of our house. Mark took Sofia for the day, so we decided to stay in. We're on our backs, holding hands, watching the clouds. It's perfectly sunny today. The rays are shining down on her pale face, glinting slightly off of her glossed lips. Her eyes are closed and her long eyelashes rest gently on her soft cheeks, slightly rosy from a mixture of rare sun and good wine. Her hair is curled, just the way it was when she kissed me for the first time. She kissed me. She walked into a grimy bar bathroom and she kissed me. She chose me and I can't help but wonder, how did I get so lucky? I was so broken and she was my glue and as I'm lying here looking at my beautiful wife, I realize that nobody else could have put me back together the way she did. She kissed me. She chose me. I'm looking at her and her eyes are shut, but I know what the color of heaven is behind the lids. I look back up to the sky trying to find a picture in the clouds, but all I find in an IMAX screen above me cascaded with memories.<p>

I see the moment after she kissed me and she promised me that I'd know who would love me whenever I chose to leave my depressed state. I remember seeing myself in her eyes and seeing the world bloom with possibility. I think of the time when we went to dinner and it was supposed to be our night but then it wasn't. Then I think of her gall to confront me about it the next day. She didn't even like sandwiches, but she liked me and I liked her and we would have eaten anything if it meant being together. I think of the time when we started talking about Spain and babies and she packed her things. I think of the time so soon after that when I saw her in the elevator and just looked so angelic and perfect and sad. All I wanted was to make her happy. That's all I ever wanted. And again she kissed me. She stole my breath and my heart in one tragically beautiful swoop. I had sworn her off until we were held at gunpoint together and I realized that I didn't want to live without her; I couldn't live without her. We were so happy for such a short time and then…then she left and I felt empty. I felt so empty. There was this gargantuan void inside of me that was filled with self-pity and lost love. But then, like this incredible gift, she came home. She came back. She flew across the world. For me. I tried not to forgive her because I never wanted to feel that vacuous again. I hurt so deep inside of me and I would have rather just stayed torn in two than have to feel so much ecstasy and have it stolen again. And then I saw the glimmering truth beneath all of the pain-I needed her. I didn't want to need her, but she was my other half. I had to tell her about Mark and the baby she still took me back. She still loved me. She was still my eternal love, my soul mate.

I think of when I almost died and I remember nothing but willing myself to wake up just so I could say yes and marry her and make her mine forever. She wanted rings and commitment, but I just wanted her. I think of our wedding. I finally got to tell her exactly how I felt. I had always held back just a little, I was so afraid to scare her off. I wanted to tell her everything, bare myself to her, in front of everyone. "My Arizona," I had started with a shaking voice. "I love you. I love you more than anyone and anything. I love you more than the birds in the trees and the clouds in the sky. I love you more than music, more than food, more than surgery. You are the air in my lungs. You are the blood in my veins. You are the only thing I need in this world because you _are _this world to me. I could promise to love you for forever and a day, but that's unrealistic. I promise to love you until I'm so full of love that I can't possibly love you anymore. I promise to support you through this life and the next. I promise to hold you through the dark times and carry you back to this beautiful life. I promise to give you everything, to give you myself. Arizona, there's a line from Sofia's favorite book that you read every night. The words tumble from your mouth sweetly and she smiles and I see my life in you. 'I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, as long as I'm living my baby you'll be.' You are mine forever mi amor, and I've never been so excited to grow old. I love you."

And now, six months later, I'm here. I'm on this blanket with her and I see the ring I slipped on her finger that perfectly compliments her delicate hands. I'm watching the sky, but her face is everywhere. I'm hearing the light wind, but it's all laced with her silky voice. I'm all the way over here and she's an entire arm's length away. I turn my head to look at her and smile as her eyes ignite my world. "Calliope, what are you thinking?" she asks me. I'm thinking of her; I always am. "I love you," I say, my grin consuming my face. She smiles that super-magic smile and gives me a kiss. I roll over and pull her close to me, invading her perfect mouth with mine. Forget the air, I'll breathe her instead.


End file.
